God, i'm not the type to talk to people. i don't want to lose another friend again. i should keep my mouth shut in case something happen. stuff everything to myself. so many things i want to talk but just could not say it out anymore.

The feeling of fear to lose a friend


I don't even dota anymore.

These few days, i've just been telling myself. i have to change. but i still want to live the life i was. just be myself. but. FUCK I DON"T EVEN DARE TO TALK ANYMORE

crap. living like this. i rather die.


2 choice here yeah?



1. Just Change myself
2. Death


I can't take this anymore. Fear is building up inside my heart. dear readers.

do you have this feeling of wanting to talk to the person more. but just afraid that u'll lose that one person who is important to you? regardless of friend, family or any other relationship you have with that person? well i have.

i really admire those people who can live so carefree.


i tired so hard. to make people around happy. i failed horribly
perhaps, i'm just not the person to make people happy.
maybe, i should just be quited
maybe, i'm just not the guy to have any friend
maybe, i landed on this world by mistake

yep. look at the bright side of life? don't crap me.

i don't think i can

thank people who put up against me.
but now you don't have to anymore.

because, i've choose to walk my path by myself.

guess this is what they called failure huh?

can't even send out a message without looking at the send button for time
lets end this reading shall we?


Goodbye